Should your family information be a secret?

You know what they say about the best-laid plans going awry? My genealogical plans seem to be plagued by a chronic affliction called Murphy’s Law.

Twice in the past few months, I’ve signed up for an introductory class on genealogy with a local school system. Twice it’s been canceled because of a lack of interest. What’s up with that? I keep telling people how popular researching family history is and we can’t even convene a quorum of genealogical wannabes?

Fortunately, the Iowa Genealogical Society has a 2-hour beginners’ session coming up. I’ve been waiting to unwrap and install my new Family Tree Maker 2008 until my class began, but I guess I’ll plunge ahead on my own. Thanks to all the great genealogy bloggers out there, I feel like someone’s got my back on this one.

So, instead of writing about my hopes for my new class, I’ve decided to take on the sensitive topic of privacy vs. access. Although this has long been a topic of interest to genealogists, the rhetoric has sharpened in recent years because of the proliferation of identity theft and tighter governmental restrictions on data in the wake of the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks.

It wasn’t that long ago that we shared our Social Security numbers with virtually anyone who asked. I remember when I first opted to leave my SSAN off my driver’s license about 30 years ago. It was a novelty then; it’s the law now.

Access to vital records is the lifeblood of genealogical research. Although the explosive growth of the Internet has been matched or exceeded by  easy access to these records, many genealogists feel threatened by the new trends. It’s not just government records, either. What about all those personal history sites that have popped up? When is it OK to list information about a family member?

Here’s a news account about twins who were separated at birth, met as adults, fell in love and married. The marriage was annulled when their true relationship was discovered and a discussion has begun on what public information may have prevented this. You can also read Janice Brown’s post at her Cow Hampshire blog on the whole privacy/genealogy issue.

How have you come to grips with this vexing problem?

Larry Lehmer, founder and president of When Words Matter, is a personal historian who helps people preserve their family histories. To learn more, visit his web site or send him an e-mail.

Flickr photo courtesy of jaki good.

Comments

[Brenda Friedrich]

When is it OK to list information about a family member? This is a great question and I wonder how other bloggers are dealing with it. I launched my blog primarily to share stories from my life. But I don't live in a vacuum; the lives of others intersect with mine. As an example, my parents are in their eighties. With an aging population, many issues arise. How can I still respect my folk's privacy (and sense of dignity) yet still honestly discuss the challenges that I face with them?

In dealing with other family members it's easier. I refer to them by first name only and I rarely disclose where they live. Even then I sometimes contact these family members first to make sure there is no objection to sharing particular stories.

[Larry Lehmer]

Thanks for your comments, Brenda. I wonder, too, about using real people's names as I save stories of my own past. The journalist in me says to use them, but the actual name isn't likely to be important to anyone else not already familiar with the story. It's a conundrum, for sure.

[Bill West]

Larry,
I've thought about this many times. My use of names vary according to the situation. If I am quoting or making use of someone else's
research on my blog I get their permission to use it first and give their full name on the blog. For some of the newfound cousins who I've been in contact with, I use initials unless or until I have permission to use their full name.And if one of those new contacts asks me for an email address of another, I tell them I need to see if that second person is willing to give their email address out. This happened recently with my two newly discovered cousins and once I had permission I gave the address.

It's a different world out there from when I was a kid. I posted wedding pictures last year of my niece and nephews and I hesitated
doing it because of the predators out there.

[Marlys Styne]

1. I have done quite well with my family history on line at Ancestry.com. I never looked for genealogy classes, etc. I'm now at the point where I would have to hire researchers in England to sort out the many John Marshalls among my ancestors (if, indeed, it could be done)to go further. I think I'll pass.

2. I'm not aware of any scandals in my family, and for the most part, they've been an open, law-abiding midwestern lot. So far, none of the living relatives have objected to what I wrote about them (and of course the deceased can't). I can see how this could be a problem in some families, however. I have used made-up names to hide the identities of a few friends and acquaintances if I'm not sure how they'd react.

[Larry Lehmer]

Bill: Your decision to exercise caution is wise, I think. It is, indeed, a different world these days.

Marlys: Sounds like you're doing well in your research. I'm still wrestling with the openness vs. privacy issue in my own family research. The democracy of the online world can be as problematic as it is helpful.